Paddy B.

Review of Oxo Tower Brasserie

23 May 08, 14:15

Tight

I've never been up the oxo tower, it's not really my idea of fun. But a mate of mine took his girlfriend up there recently. Apparantly she wasn't too keen to start with, but once they got going she really got into it.

He'd wanted to go for ages and really had to nag her into giving it a whirl.

They haven't been since but she's not said no to giving it another try when she's in the right mood.

1 out of 1 person found this review helpful.

Review of The Body Shop

02 May 08, 17:00

smelly

This shop amazes me, it's full of really wierd stuff.

They must sit at their head office and throw the contents of a fridge into a blender.

0 out of 0 people found this review helpful.

Review of Bottoms Up

17 Apr 08, 16:46

Big

As off licences go, this place is BIG.. real BIG!

In fact it's VASTE.

That's good news for you and me because it means a big selction of wine and beer.

They even had a few videos floating around last time I was in.. crazy!

1 out of 1 person found this review helpful.

Review of New Ming

17 Apr 08, 16:40

Not Ming-ing

I don't know what happened to Old Ming but New Ming is rocking the resturant trade in Petts Wood.

They specialise in food with a Chinese flava.

Their other specility are carved carrots. Watch out for the carrot humming bird and the carrot butterfly.

You're allowed to take them home with you if you want, but only if you hide them in your jacket and don't tell the waiter you're taking them home.

0 out of 0 people found this review helpful.

Review of Animal Magic

17 Apr 08, 13:58

Magic

We're going to the zoo, zoo, zoo. How about you, you, you?

Ahh Johnny Morris and all his animals.

He has nothing to do with this shop.

It doesn't even have that many animals in it. It prefers to specialise in animal based products instead

1 out of 1 person found this review helpful.

Review of Hotel Chocolat

17 Apr 08, 13:49

All about chocolate

A couple of years back we were all just content with buying bars of chocolate in corner shops, but now there are entire shops devoted to it.

I'm allergic to the stuff so probably not best placed to comment on this shop's merchandise but it certainly looks the part.

0 out of 0 people found this review helpful.

Review of Top Kat Scooters

17 Apr 08, 12:45

Not for cats

The name of this place is a reference to a kids TV show from the 70's-80's it's NOT a shop that sells scooters for cats. That would be ridiculous.

Scooters have become very popular in London as they are exempt from the congestion charge.

This store will sell you a scooter. They sell the girly Italian ones and the manly Yamaha ones too.

1 out of 1 person found this review helpful.

Review of Millie's Cookies

17 Apr 08, 12:32

a revelation

The good people of Bromley survived for hundreds of years without the need for cookies and then Mille's opened up and they went cookie mad.

I think the size of the cookies may have shrunk in the last couple of years, just wagon-wheels and Big Macs have shrunk... have you had a Big Mac recently? They're tiny now.. like those mini burgers you get at all the best parites.

Anyway this place sells cookies and they'll even write a birthday message on one if you're they type of person who gives someone you love a cookie for their birthday.

0 out of 0 people found this review helpful.

Review of Massimo Dutti

17 Apr 08, 12:29

Posh Zara

Not a lot of people know that polar bears are left handed.

And not a lot of people know that Massimo Dutti is owned by Zara but you do now.

So this is just a posh version of the shop next door.

The staff in here seem to float around on a cushion of air rather than walk.

They sell all kinds of posh clobber.

0 out of 0 people found this review helpful.

Review of Spudulike

17 Apr 08, 09:44

Potato

I used to think this name fast food joint was just an urban myth.. didn't the slobs in Harry Enfield's show call their daughter Spudulika? Anyway, it's not a myth because there's one in Bromley and I've seen it with my own eyes. It's big and colourful and full of potato. You can pick your topping too. They do all the usual ones like tuna and beans or you can go all Continental and have cottage cheese if you want.

0 out of 0 people found this review helpful.

Review of Virgin Retail

17 Apr 08, 09:43

This is called Zavvi now

The digital revolution hasn't hit Bromley yet, this is a huge CD and DVD shop. So if you can't be bothered to go to all that trouble of clicking "buy" on itunes why not go down to Zavvi and spend a while brousing through their racks and racks of discs? This store though has a lovely Classical/Jazz room at the back which is a bit like a chill out area in a club. Great if you fancy a nap. When our kids grow up they'll look at pictures of this shop in wonder.

0 out of 0 people found this review helpful.

Review of Clinton Cards

17 Apr 08, 09:41

Cards cards cards

Women just love giving each other pieces of card folded over and this shop caters for that insatiable need. They sell birthday cards, anniversary cards, get well cards, wedding cards, engagement cards, congratulations cards, good luck cards, christening cards, apologies cards, new baby cards, blank cards and those horrible teddy bears with the eyes really close together like they're the product of years on inbreeding.

0 out of 0 people found this review helpful.

Review of Zara

17 Apr 08, 09:41

Zara

This is a big Zara store. It sells clothes for everyone in only the way Zara can! But in Bromley they like to do things a bit differently by making sure all the clothes they stock are only available in XXL size. Whether this is done with the local population in mind or just because they can't get their hands on any other size in unclear. They'll also make sure you have an opportunity for a little period of reflection in your shopping trip, by allowing you to queue for 20 minutes before paying for your clothes. They do this my ensuring that, even on a busy Saturday, they only ever have 2 tills open.

0 out of 0 people found this review helpful.

Review of Original Levi's Store

17 Apr 08, 08:47

Original

Levi Strauss' dying words were "Open me a store in Bromley", and 100 years after his death they did just that. They would have done it earlier but there just wasn't a unit available in Bromley until the construction of The Glades Shopping Centre. If buying expensive jeans is your thing then this is your place.

0 out of 0 people found this review helpful.

Review of French Connection

17 Apr 08, 08:46

Slope

This store's unique selling point is it's amazing uneven floor. The slope is quite staggering in some places and I'd imagine a real hazard for anyone without adaquate grippage on their shoe, although it's perfect for the disabled. Every time I go in here I struggle to work out exactly what the French Connection is, but who cares? They seem proud of the connection and with confidence like that you have to pay attention.

0 out of 0 people found this review helpful.

Review of Austin Reed

17 Apr 08, 08:46

Slacks

Usually favoured by people who spend a lot of time on boats this store is nowhere near the sea or a river but it still seems popular. So popular that they've knocked 3 shops together to create heaven for anyone who likes to put a jumper around their shoulders or tuck a light blue shirt into some tailored shorts. There's Austin Reed's trademark "old guy" working in the suit dept ready to measure your inside-leg and a snooty "old gal" in the women's dept ready to turn away any undesirables with just the power of a stare.

0 out of 0 people found this review helpful.

Review of Pret A Manger

15 Apr 08, 18:23

Ready to Eat

Pret a Manger means Ready to Eat in French.

It's a slightly deceptive name because this place doesn't only sell food stuffs, it also sells drinks.

Perhaps Pret a Manger et Boire might have been a more accurate name.

They sell sandwiches which are full of odd ingredients and insist on giving you 15 napkins per order.

0 out of 0 people found this review helpful.

Review of St Christopher's Hospice Charity Shop

15 Apr 08, 17:40

Great hat selection

I get the impression hats aren't a popular commodity in charity shops and that all the others in Beckenham hand theirs over to this place because there's a huge selection here.

They do though get a bit picky about what they accept if you try and give them stuff and often stop taking any donations altogether.

0 out of 0 people found this review helpful.

Review of Greggs

15 Apr 08, 17:36

Every High Street should have one

Who can argue with a Greggs?

This one is special because it hasn't been upgraded and if you order a coffee it'll be made with instant and a kettle.. old school!

The pasties are as good here as in any Greggs.

Here's a tip though get a bean and sausage one and put a steak bake on top of it and eat them together. Ummmm

0 out of 0 people found this review helpful.

Review of Pitcher and Piano

15 Apr 08, 17:26

Not a fan

It's hard to see why anyone goes here. It's a bit of a warehouse without any real character. The drinks are expensive and they give you your change on a little plate.. as if I'm going to tip you for serving me 2 drinks

It has loud music and sticky floors

0 out of 0 people found this review helpful.

Review of Oh Bar

15 Apr 08, 12:41

Generally a bit odd

Place has live music at the back most nights and has a collection of odd locals at the front most days.

Big bar area but gets busy at the weekends. Free wifi access if you buy a drink.

0 out of 0 people found this review helpful.

Review of Edinboro Castle

15 Apr 08, 12:37

great BBQ

The sort of place you can spend a day getting slowly trashed on cider.

In the summer the huge beer garden is great with tented areas and a big BBQ somedays.

Gets really busy though with people spilling out of Regents Park

0 out of 0 people found this review helpful.

Review of Friends Of Mine

15 Apr 08, 12:13

Ladies who lunch

Just re-opened after a fire a couple of years ago, this place seems to be a favourite with Crystal Palace players and their ladies.

Swanky looking place with bottled beer only

Rammed on a Friday/Saturday night.

0 out of 0 people found this review helpful.

Review of La Rascasse

15 Apr 08, 12:06

A bit pretentious

I've never tried the French resturant attached to this bar, but it's always busy.. although the prices are a bit steep for me.

The bar is really small and so gets really busy most nights. There's a garden tent bit out the back which hilariously contains a VIP section, which is just a few seats with a velvet rope around them.

0 out of 0 people found this review helpful.

Review of George Inn

15 Apr 08, 11:57

Nice friendly local

This place has gotten a lot better since the smoking ban. It used to be a really smoggy bar, now it's a lot more enjoyable.

There's a good garden too right on the High Street.

Not really the sort of place I'd want to eat, but a good antidote to the other swanky-ish bars in Beckenham

0 out of 0 people found this review helpful.

Review of Miso Noodle Bar

15 Apr 08, 11:55

Entirely as expected

Noodles in a bar. Basically it does what it says on the tin.

You get massive portions though so you don't need to order more than one dish. Gets busy at weekends.

0 out of 0 people found this review helpful.

Review of O'Neill's Irish Bar

15 Apr 08, 11:54

Used to be better

This place used to have some great live Irish music on a Thursday, but then the morons who bought the converted flats above it complained that it was too noisy and the council banned the music.

If I was to buy a flat directly above a pub which had signs all over it saying LIVE MUSIC ON A THURSDAY, I wouldn't be surprised to hear live music on a Thursday.

Still it's nice enough. They play a lot of the sports although annoyingly won't put the commentary on a lot of the time. And karioke on a Thursday's worth a laugh!

0 out of 0 people found this review helpful.